Flexibility

The most flexible element in any system will tend to control that system.

Especially as it relates to people, the person who can maintain the greatest level of flexibility while enforcing their boundaries will control the situation. In NLP, people pride themselves on being ‘cool-headed’ as if nothing gets to them. They will hide behind a smug grin while someone is shouting in their face. The fact is that sometimes you need to have flexibility in your behavior and that may mean choosing a behavior that is confrontational. The question is do you control your behavior, are you being flexible, or is the behavior controlling you?

The classic example of this is the child who throws a tantrum in a public to get ice cream and mom or dad acquiesces and buys the child the ice cream. I remember one time when my child did the very same thing. I sat quietly waiting for the end of the tantrum and as it quieted down I ask, “Are you through?” “Yes sir”, came the defeated response. Some times being flexible means allowing something to happen and being okay with that.

BE Amazing,

-Lane