Last Friday, I watched the movie The Moses Code. It is a great movie and I highly recommend it. If you enjoyed watching movies like The Secret and What The Bleep, Then I know you will enjoy The Moses Code.
If you have been a reader of my newsletter, you already know that I believe in you as an empowered individual. You are the all powerful creature of that which you choose to experience. You are always doing exactly what you need to do to get the results you are getting. - and - that means - you're the one driving your bus. You ARE in control.
The Moses Code is all about regaining your awareness of that fact.
In the work I do with my clients, sometimes they feel as though they are knocked about by all the circumstances of their life and that, for some reason, they are 'broken'. This is far from the truth.
The reality of our life is that from time to time, we do experience things that are other than what we truly desire to experience. I submit to you that those times, now, when you look back on them, are times that you probably would not give up because you did end up learning something important. Something that perhaps you would not have learned any other way. You are who you are today because of the experience and learnings you have had all along the way.
You are the sum total of everything you have observed into your experience.
As you go about your day today or tomorrow do this little exercise. With everything you observe (sight, sound, smell, taste or touch) say to yourself, "I am that."
BE Amazing!
-Lane
Monday, March 30, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
More Effective Communication
Last week, I mentioned that if you would hold in your mind, the most amazing, most wonderful outcome for what you are saying; that will create a whole new level of your communication.
This week, let's add another component to empowering your language.
First, I think it is important to understand how we might measure the quality of communication. In NLP, there is a presupposition that says, "The meaning of communication is the results you get." Also, in NLP, we operate on the principle that what a person is saying is not as important as the thinking behind what they are saying.
Rapport is the secret to really good communication. When you are in rapport, the communication flows easily in a trusted way between you and the other person.
Last evening, I was in Fry's Electronics in Irving, TX and I was looking for a scanner that would work with the Mac. I went to the computer department and asked the supervisor there if someone could help me find a scanner for a Mac. There was a sales rep from Epson who decided that I must be stupid because "any scanner would work with the Mac." His attitude and interjection into a conversation I was having with someone else was certainly not building rapport. I was on a mission to find a scanner, not create rapport with this fellow, however I figured he might be able to show me something I missed, so I followed him over to the scanners.
He showed me desktop scanners and I wanted portable. He showed me scanners for PCs and I wanted scanners for Mac. In a final bid, handed me a box with a really nice portable scanner in it and PC software for scanning. It was $200. I told him I didn't think the store was going to give me a discount for software I couldn't use. I gave him the box back and left. I did not trust him or his knowledge at all.
I got to thinking afterward that there was no rapport in that exchange. The salesman didn't take the time to discover my needs. I ask for someone to help me find a scanner for a Mac. My thinking was, I need to scan - I want a reasonable price - I don't know about or care about software.
Well, I went to front of the store and explained my experience to a store manager. After a courteous acknowledgement, he said, "I think I have what you need." We walked over to another location and he showed me two scanners, both of which would fulfill my needs.
Rapport is the magic of empowered communications.
BE Amazing,
-Lane
This week, let's add another component to empowering your language.
First, I think it is important to understand how we might measure the quality of communication. In NLP, there is a presupposition that says, "The meaning of communication is the results you get." Also, in NLP, we operate on the principle that what a person is saying is not as important as the thinking behind what they are saying.
Rapport is the secret to really good communication. When you are in rapport, the communication flows easily in a trusted way between you and the other person.
Last evening, I was in Fry's Electronics in Irving, TX and I was looking for a scanner that would work with the Mac. I went to the computer department and asked the supervisor there if someone could help me find a scanner for a Mac. There was a sales rep from Epson who decided that I must be stupid because "any scanner would work with the Mac." His attitude and interjection into a conversation I was having with someone else was certainly not building rapport. I was on a mission to find a scanner, not create rapport with this fellow, however I figured he might be able to show me something I missed, so I followed him over to the scanners.
He showed me desktop scanners and I wanted portable. He showed me scanners for PCs and I wanted scanners for Mac. In a final bid, handed me a box with a really nice portable scanner in it and PC software for scanning. It was $200. I told him I didn't think the store was going to give me a discount for software I couldn't use. I gave him the box back and left. I did not trust him or his knowledge at all.
I got to thinking afterward that there was no rapport in that exchange. The salesman didn't take the time to discover my needs. I ask for someone to help me find a scanner for a Mac. My thinking was, I need to scan - I want a reasonable price - I don't know about or care about software.
Well, I went to front of the store and explained my experience to a store manager. After a courteous acknowledgement, he said, "I think I have what you need." We walked over to another location and he showed me two scanners, both of which would fulfill my needs.
Rapport is the magic of empowered communications.
BE Amazing,
-Lane
Monday, March 16, 2009
Effective Communications
Last Friday evening I spoke to a group of about 30 people on Effective Communications. It was a great time! We got through a tremendous amount of information in just a couple of hours.
Communication is so important in our everyday lives. You are always communicating even when you think you are not! Well... I figure if you are always communicating then perhaps you should do so on purpose. ;-)
A study done many years ago by Dr. Ray Birdwhistle published in his book Kinesics in Context (1970) revealed that the words we speak only make up 7% of our intended communication. The remaining 93% of your intended communication is contained in your body language and your tone of voice.
Now, knowing this little tidbit of information, you can begin to create a more powerful, more effective communication. How? Very easy... just hold in your mind the best possible outcome for saying what you are saying.
Think about this for a minute. If you must deliver some news that is not good, and you slump your body, put a grimace on your face and lower your voice; that will actually amplify the feelings of "how bad" things are. It is possible to deliver not good news from a place of confidence, courage and compassion.
Hold you head up, shoulders up, speak confidently, and with heart. Whether the listener chooses to receive your message with good or not good emotions is their choice. You however will have created the best possible condition for them to receive your communication in an empowered, effective way - just as you intended it!
BE Amazing,
-Lane
Communication is so important in our everyday lives. You are always communicating even when you think you are not! Well... I figure if you are always communicating then perhaps you should do so on purpose. ;-)
A study done many years ago by Dr. Ray Birdwhistle published in his book Kinesics in Context (1970) revealed that the words we speak only make up 7% of our intended communication. The remaining 93% of your intended communication is contained in your body language and your tone of voice.
Now, knowing this little tidbit of information, you can begin to create a more powerful, more effective communication. How? Very easy... just hold in your mind the best possible outcome for saying what you are saying.
Think about this for a minute. If you must deliver some news that is not good, and you slump your body, put a grimace on your face and lower your voice; that will actually amplify the feelings of "how bad" things are. It is possible to deliver not good news from a place of confidence, courage and compassion.
Hold you head up, shoulders up, speak confidently, and with heart. Whether the listener chooses to receive your message with good or not good emotions is their choice. You however will have created the best possible condition for them to receive your communication in an empowered, effective way - just as you intended it!
BE Amazing,
-Lane
Monday, March 9, 2009
Let Your Emotions Guide You
The air conditioner went out in our car several of months ago while we are on a trip to Florida. We stopped, had it repaired and went about our way. About 4 hours later, the air blowing out the vents lost its cool. Luckily, I did not. I was concerned however. I had just spent a bunch of money and now I wondered just how much it would cost to get it fixed right. I felt I had wasted my money. I was really not happy about the whole thing, in fact, I was really focused on this problem and all the trouble it was going to cause me.
Since I was focused on the problem I was experiencing some negative emotions and I didn't feel good about it at all.
Since winter was coming on, I put it off and didn't pay any attention to the problem. I didn't give it any energy and therefore I didn't feel any negative emotion about it.
Here in North Texas, the temperature is rising. Last week, we reach over 90 degrees (Fahrenheit). I was driving the car and it was warm! I decided it was time to get the AC fixed.
As I focused on doing what I wanted (creating the experience I wanted to experience) I felt really good. I was exercising my power - my authority to do what I wanted to do, and inside, I felt a sense of empowerment.
If you focus on the problem the result will be the feeling of a negative emotion.
If you focus on the solution the result will be the feeling of a positive emotion.
Your emotions will let you know where you have chosen to place your energy. The interesting thing about where you place your focus is that you will actually create more of that in your life. In any situation, your feelings will guide you. It is an internal feedback mechanism. What a gift!
BE Amazing,
-Lane
Since I was focused on the problem I was experiencing some negative emotions and I didn't feel good about it at all.
Since winter was coming on, I put it off and didn't pay any attention to the problem. I didn't give it any energy and therefore I didn't feel any negative emotion about it.
Here in North Texas, the temperature is rising. Last week, we reach over 90 degrees (Fahrenheit). I was driving the car and it was warm! I decided it was time to get the AC fixed.
As I focused on doing what I wanted (creating the experience I wanted to experience) I felt really good. I was exercising my power - my authority to do what I wanted to do, and inside, I felt a sense of empowerment.
If you focus on the problem the result will be the feeling of a negative emotion.
If you focus on the solution the result will be the feeling of a positive emotion.
Your emotions will let you know where you have chosen to place your energy. The interesting thing about where you place your focus is that you will actually create more of that in your life. In any situation, your feelings will guide you. It is an internal feedback mechanism. What a gift!
BE Amazing,
-Lane
Monday, March 2, 2009
Be Really Really Kind to Yourself
A very good friend of mine often reminds her friends and students to "be really really kind to yourself".
Can I let you in on a secret? Every judgment you place on someone, or something, else is a judgment you place on yourself.
Consider this, have you ever been angry with someone? And... how did you feel? Right, you felt angry. The other person didn't feel your anger. Only you experienced that feeling.
So, let me be honest with you. When you are feeling some negative emotion about someone else, you are the one experiencing the not so good feeling. Since you are the only one in control of your emotions, you are, in reality, not being kind to yourself.
That's right! You are in control of your emotions. Well, perhaps I should say, you are responsible for your emotions. You are in control of your emotions the moment you decide to take control.
Would you like to know how to be in control of your emotions? It is pretty easy to do. It is true that when you remember a time when you were really angry then you will actually begin to feel angry. Since that is the case then it makes sense that if you remember a time when you felt really joyful then you will feel joyful. Give it a try.
Your emotions are always a result of your focus and your expectations. Decide to find the good in every situation.
I remember a funny story about the little boy from the city visiting his grandpa in the country. Grandpa found the little boy with a smile on his face, digging in in a pile horse poo. Grandpa said, "What are you doing boy?" The little boy responded, "Grandpa, there's gotta be a pony in here somewhere!"
Be really really kind to yourself. Find the good in everything. You always get what you look for.
BE Amazing,
-Lane
Can I let you in on a secret? Every judgment you place on someone, or something, else is a judgment you place on yourself.
Consider this, have you ever been angry with someone? And... how did you feel? Right, you felt angry. The other person didn't feel your anger. Only you experienced that feeling.
So, let me be honest with you. When you are feeling some negative emotion about someone else, you are the one experiencing the not so good feeling. Since you are the only one in control of your emotions, you are, in reality, not being kind to yourself.
That's right! You are in control of your emotions. Well, perhaps I should say, you are responsible for your emotions. You are in control of your emotions the moment you decide to take control.
Would you like to know how to be in control of your emotions? It is pretty easy to do. It is true that when you remember a time when you were really angry then you will actually begin to feel angry. Since that is the case then it makes sense that if you remember a time when you felt really joyful then you will feel joyful. Give it a try.
Your emotions are always a result of your focus and your expectations. Decide to find the good in every situation.
I remember a funny story about the little boy from the city visiting his grandpa in the country. Grandpa found the little boy with a smile on his face, digging in in a pile horse poo. Grandpa said, "What are you doing boy?" The little boy responded, "Grandpa, there's gotta be a pony in here somewhere!"
Be really really kind to yourself. Find the good in everything. You always get what you look for.
BE Amazing,
-Lane
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